everybody's got their something

as i lay in bed, about to be lulled to sleep by the soft and steady tap of rain on my wall o' windows, i heard a shout.

"WOO!"

then some clapping, followed by what i assume is the very sound advice of a lifelong fan: "No, don't do that!"

more clapping.

a few "Yeah!"s.

i'll admit that, in general, i've never really understood peoples' love of watching televised sports. this phenomenon has never made sense to me, despite growing up in a family full of sports-loving men. but i feel like even if i were a sports fan, i'd still find it strange that a fairly normal twenty-five year old girl would sit alone in her dark living room and hoot and clap and even give advice to the Phillies.

i don't care that this same oddity was occurring all over the city; i'd never be caught engaging in that sort of silliness.

though as i stared at my ceiling, chuckling to myself and listening to the claps and excited utterances coming down the hall from my living room, i realized that my judgment was just a little bit hypocritical. i'm a pretty big fan myself -- just not of sports.

it probably began in high school, when i'd talk to Ally McBeal on the screen. i don't know if i've ever given advice to the tv characters, but i've definitely yelled, cried, and reacted in shock at times, like when Serena on Gossip Girl confessed that she "killed someone," or gasped in disgust when we found out Justin was dating his own sister on Bros 'n Hos.

i guess i'm starting to sympathize with sports fans. in the end, what's the difference between (1) an engaging plot line involving well-known characters on a dramatic series and (2) a suspenseful reality-based storyline involving well-known players on a sports field? the guy on the edge of his seat watching a playoff game isn't that different from my grandma, left in suspense from day to day about the latest plot twist on The Young and the Restless.

eventually both series end, and the fans' lives aren't affected in any way, regardless of the outcome. your team is the world series champion? so what, they're just going to do it all over again next year, and once again it will have no effect on your life. an Emmy-winning performance on your fave show? who cares, your life is still the same boring mess, and YOU have no award on your mantle.

sports fans, soap opera addicts, and those of us obsessed with anything on the CW alike, we're all after the same sense of drama and suspense. does that give anyone an excuse to hoot and clap and -- by the sounds of it -- celebratorily bounce on the sofa while totally alone in front of a television? i submit that it does not.



if shaunice catches me clapping some night while watching Vampire Diaries, i'll humbly retract the above submission.