So, this is my life.
And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
my secret is that i judge people for not having pets -- more specifically, i judge potential boyfriend people for not having pets. i don't care if he's a dog person or a cat person. or both. i'm both and would have one of each if i could. i'm bi-petual, if you will.
the pet question is one of my first when i go on a date. if he has no pet, i withhold judgment for long enough a little to inquire about why. some people want a pet but are too busy. some people would love to adopt but aren't able to keep dogs or cats in their apartments. some people are allergic. i understand this, and i can't judge the petless pet lovers. but when i meet a guy who has no interest in pets and never had a beloved childhood pet, i write him off as a freak, or at least as not great boyfriend material.
harsh? maybe a little. but, as i explained to a friend last week when the topic of dating guys with dogs came up, i think that a guy's potential to love and care for a pet says a lot about his potential to love and care for a partner.
i should add here that the friend with whom i had this conversation disagreed with me. he said that he prefers to date guys who don't have pets -- especially dogs -- because pets are annoying and burdensome. i'll admit that i've been annoyed in the past when my dates have had to go home early or were unable to "make a night of it" because their dogs needed to be walked or fed. still, i always liked that they had dogs. i like when guys get gushy and excited about their pets. and i love a guy who knows how to give a good belly rub.
my primary reason for screening men based upon pet ownership is that i view pets as outlets for affection, in that people who have a lot of love inside of them but don't have partners still need an outlet for all their affection. enter my catticus, who is so effing sick of being hugged all the time, but who still sits with me while i blog.
the guy without a pet, though -- does he not have love to share? does he not want a warm friend cuddling beside him or sleeping on his feet on cold winter nights? is he heartless, and potentially a serial killer? these are the things i think about on first dates with petless boys.
am i crazy for thinking this way? my disagreeing friend said that i am insane. what do you think?