So, this is my life.

And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

here i am, once again

give me a few hours alone in a car, and i will almost always choose to spend the time taking the familiar audio trek through what i call The Clarkson Trilogy.

so i feel obligated to update an entry from about a year and a half ago so as to reflect the most recent twist in Kelly's romantically bipolar songwriting:

Friday, October 19, 2007

evolution


the trouble with love is, it can tear you up inside
make your heart believe a lie


and if i try to save him, my whole world could cave in
it just ain't right, and i don't know what he's after


and i know i let you have all the power
and i realize i'm never going to quit you over time
it's like i can't breathe
it's like i can't see anything
nothing but you


sometimes shattered, never open
nothing matters when you're broken
that was me whenever i was with you
always ending, always over
back and forth, up and down like a roller-coaster
i am breaking that habit
today


my heart can't possibly break
when it wasn't even whole to start with


what do you do when you look in the mirror
and staring at you is why he's not here


and i don't know, i could crash and burn
but maybe at the end of this road
i might catch a glimpse of me
so i won't worry about my timing
i want to get it right
no comparing, second-guessing
no, not this time


i would never wish bad things
but i don't wish you well...
never again will i love you
never


i don't want to be tough
and i don't want to be proud
but i don't need to be fixed
and i certainly don't need to be found
i'm not lost

maybe i've got issues
but you're pretty messed up, too
either way, i found out
i'm nothing without you

if the rest of the album follows this manic lead, we'll have an up-beat, fun, and maybe even romantic soundtrack on our hands in just a couple months.


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