So, this is my life.

And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

unanswered questions

i've learned a lot in the past 2 months of studying. i now know everything there is to know about the law. every law. all laws. total. knowledge.

but there are still a few things i don't understand

-why traffic jams and then *suddenly* un-jams... with no explanation for the "bottleneck" effect in the middle of an otherwise usual highway.

-how it can take 35 minutes to cook a burrito in the oven and only 3 minutes to cook the same burrito in the microwave; or why hasn't someone found a happy medium.

-why anyone would buy toothpaste that doesn't whiten, or doesn't even claim to whiten.

-why somebody decided to give rachel ray her own tv show.

-why a protein shake made with milk tastes like a delicious ice cream treat, whereas the very same protein mixed in water tastes and smells exactly. like. fart.

-the appeal of so you think you can dance.

-why we collectively fail to question the price of wine in a restaurant (e.g. $34) when we all know the real price of that bottle is far less than the store price (approx. $7.99). and on that note, did you know that the largest retailer of wine in the US is olive garden? truth.

-the trick to a bottle of heinz ketchu--- oh wait, i DO know that.

-when it became more socially acceptable to flirt via text message than in person.

-dave matthews band. what is it that i've been missing since circa 1998?

disclaimer: this list is subject to modification and/or addition.



Patrick said...

Well, I guess I'll field the So You Think You Can Dance question... Here is my honest, slightly-educated guess as to why it's so popular.

1- There's not much on TV in the summer. Seriously. Very slim pickin's

2- The kids on this show are SUPER talented, and America loves to root for people and vote for them. People just like dancing shows in general anyway because most people can't do what the people on the show do.

3- The show is known for choosing music and highlighting artists that aren't mainstream, and introducing them to the public. SYTYCD is basically responsible for launching One Republic's "Apologize" into the Stratusphere last year. People hadn't heard of them before.

4- There's not much else on TV.

*t* said...

Mother eff...

I just wrote out a long response and lost it. :(

I short:
*SYTYCD--what PAtrick said+dancers look to the show as a source of inspiration (amazing choreographers whose work you'd have to pay to see...or pay a leg to work with).

*text flirting--since our generation has loved to talk to screens, or should I say through "social screens". In short, we've turned into a bunch of wusses.

David said...

Traffic jams: probably due to an earlier incident. Traffic doesn't unjam instantly after they clear the accident, etc. Or the road isn't equipped to handle the number of cars on it during rush hour, or some stupid driver caused the bottle neck in the first place. If the flow of cars coming in matches the flow of cars going out of the jam, it will never clear and stay the same size. Once they start, it's hard to clear until that influx of cars dies down.

Burrito cooking: try cooking on a lower microwave power; we tend to forget there are more settings than: high, level 10, cook this instantly, surface of the sun, nuke.