me: how did you lock your keys inside?
d: whatever. but... so, basically, the dog didn't get to pee for 12 hours
me: ew! now he has a U.T.I.
d: well, it's 97 years old; he probably had one anyway.
i like-a do da cha-cha.
So, this is my life.
And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.